1 Shy Author Embracing the #dab

Like many writers I’ve met, I’m naturally shy. I come from a long line of shy people and have many shy siblings. It’s in my DNA. A semi-introvert who is uncomfortable calling attention to myself. The reason I bring this up is because the release of my debut contemporary romance, BRINGING DELANEY HOME, is 5 days away and that means promoting it. This is slightly outside of my comfort zone. And by “slightly outside” I mean like “streaking on live television” outside. So, I have resolved to embrace the “dab” a la Cam Newton.

The Urban Dictionary defines “dabbing” as: “Atlanta lingo for a level of confidence in your swag. (verb) One can be seen raising his left elbow to express it.”

If you haven’t seen it, I’ll direct you to the photos (#1 & #3) from the Charlotte Observer in their article on Cam Newton and the Carolina Panthers. It’s a photo of the whole team “dabbing” and I love it. I understand not everyone is a fan. I’ll admit, my first tendency when Cam Newton arrived on the NFL football scene with his Superman pose was to think, holy cow, what a cocky guy. But it didn’t take long for me to sit back and enjoy and respect the man, the talent and the confidence that is Cameron Newton.

Now, Cam Newton and others have said he scares people. “I’m an African-American quarterback that may scare a lot of people,” Newton said, “because they haven’t seen nothing that they can compare me to.” It is a sad fact that in our enlightened world some people still judge based on skin color. I hope those numbers are few. But, I’m going to suggest another reason some people find all the posing and side-line celebratory antics off-putting. If there are other people like me, women of a certain generation 😉 we were raised with certain rules. We were taught not to brag or boast, to be humble, and to be a good sport. Calling attention to yourself was considered rude. Nice polite girls were well-behaved and quiet. “Modesty is a virtue.” Any of this sounding familiar to you?

Modest- (from Dictionary.com1. having or showing a moderate or humble estimate of one’s merits,importance, etc.; free from vanity, egotism, boastfulness, or great pretensions. 2. free from ostentation or showy extravagance.

Yup. It’s part of why girls apologize to each other during a competition or on a playing field. How many times have you heard a female athlete on a practice field say “I’m sorry” for a throw a teammate couldn’t catch? It’s part of why some women can’t accept compliments or diminish their accomplishments. (I am totally guilty of this.) This idea of modesty was ingrained in us growing up. It is so very hard to break out of this mindset. But, I’m going to try. Remember the old “Be like Mike” ad campaign? Well, I’m going to be like Cam. I’m going to attempt a level of confidence in my swag.
I watched part of Cam Newton’s interview on ESPN’s MikeAndMike show this morning, and to paraphrase he said each fan is going to hold a different opinion. If he tried to change to make one fan happy–that change would only make a different fan unhappy with him. It’s a losing situation. So he concluded, “When I look in the mirror, it’s me, you know what I’m saying? Nobody changed me. Nobody made me act this certain type of way. And I’m true to my roots. And it feels great.” <— This! 1,000 times this!
Because at the end of the day, no matter what we do for a living, we can’t make everyone happy. So why not be confident in ourselves and generous in our praise and support of those around us who’ve helped along the way. That is the confident author swagger I’m aiming for. How about you? Is there something in your life you need/want more swagger for?
Oh, right, here’s my baby swag step for the day. So, I’ve written a book. Three actually- The Cates Brothers Series- so far, brothers Quinn, Sijan and Tynan, all releasing this year with Kensington Publishing Corp’s Lyrical Press. If you like small town contemporary romance with a touch of humor, you might enjoy a look.

DELANEY Cover Resized LEE KILRAINE

2 thoughts on “1 Shy Author Embracing the #dab

  1. Looking forward to this book, Lee!!

    • Carol, thank you so much!

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